نمونه های writing کاربران و بررسی آنها

[mani_faz]

This is the integrated part, tpo 3. I had 5 spelling errors. , I feel like I'm improving.Thanks Saman for commenting on my previous job.


The lecturer provides new evidence that shed more light on the originality of the art piece and even make it very unlikely that the painting is wrongfully attributed to Rembrandt.

The fur of the dress's collar worn by the women. as depicted in the painting, and the contradiction it suggest with the cheap tawdry white cap she is wearing, was actually added later to the painting to possibly increase its extrinsic value, by someone who planned on selling it.

The doubt the reading raises about the inexperience of the painter, because of lack of appropriate analysis of shadow and light, which is far from the level of mastery Rembrandt possesses, is also eliminated, since when we remove the added color, we can clearly see that the subject was wearing a simple white dress, that would reflect the light, thus creating no shadow, as is the case in the painting.


Furthermore, researchers have found out, that the glued wooden frame, which the painting is drawn on, has also been altered by someone else. Most probably the same person who has added the fur to the collar, has also added some extra pieces of woods to the frame to make it look more elegant and luxurious , consequently increasing its value. If we just consider the original frame used at first, this frame not only completely matches the style of frames used in other works of Rembrandt, but it's also made of the material from the same tree, utilized in one of famous paintings of Rembrandt, namely his portrait of himself.

-------------------------

This is for independent part: Do you think is it more important to seek new friendship or keep old ones?

We as part of human species, are innately interested in social interactions, because it is one of the capabilities that not only distinguishes us from other species, but also has proven to be quite critical for our survival and thriving in this dynamic world. I would argue that, undoubtedly, as is the consensus among prominent psychologists, our friends can have an immense impact on our life, and consequently choosing to make new friendship or to retain the old ones, is of great importance. Personally, I believe that making new friends can prove to be more advantageous for everyone in the long run, and I will give some reasons that better shed light on my argument below.


The psychology research today, is telling us that we tend to mingle with people who are more like us, in terms of attitudes and experiences and socioecomical status, and many of them will later be our friends. These common interests and potentials turn out not to be actually advantageous for one, because they will most probably have access to the same opportunities that we already have , thus providing us with no virgin, new option. So if we retain and stick to our old friendship and do not actively seek new bonds, it's likely that we will never hear about a new job position that is in reach of people who have a very different background compared to us, and as a result, never improve significantly in our career.


Besides that, meeting new people and trying to hang out with them, could possibly push us to be more sociable and outgoing and as a result, improve our interpersonal skills, the eminence of which, is not hidden to no one in this volatile economy that constantly demands the ability to form new connections effectively and rapidly. So an employee who know how to deal with complete strangers in a way that promotes mutual interests, will be of more value to possible employers and will absolutely have more job options offered to him/her.


All in all, I strongly advocate the view that encourages people to form new connections and to find new friends due to the reasons I mentioned above.

[Saman_R]

Once again, Fascinating as always.
Perfect as well.
I'm just gonna correct grammatically your writings by then
GOOD LUCK

This one is for independent task.I've corrected 7 spelling errors. Thanks in advance

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
Always telling the truth is the most important consideration in any relationship between people.



I strongly believe that opting for the truth, is the best strategy one should take in any social interaction, or as the famous proverb promises "honesty can go a long way". There are numerous psychological and practical factors that make us humans, more susceptible to being dishonest and mendacious. Unfortunately we live in a world, where the majority of resources are severely restricted, and at the same time, we want to lead a prosperous life, so at times, we might feel like telling lies is an inevitable option. But nevertheless, I still advocate probity and candor, pertinent to some reasons I will go further into below.

Although it might be a little hard to discern at first, we are all striving for solace and comfort in life, and having an easy conscious definitely paves the way for us to reach that equanimity. This is especially critical in our close relationship, i.e our friendships and families, since we spend most of our time with them.

Furthermore, from a more holistic view, if every member of the society, is honest in his/her interactions, this will certainly lead the society to flourish as a whole. So consider university, as one of the most prevalent social institution in communities, and now suppose that students are honest about their homework and never try to cheat in exams and just present their own work. Not only, they'll be more successful later because they are realistic about their abilities and potentials, but they also feel more comfortable before the exams because they've better mastered the materials as a result.

On a larger scale, we might also consider government officials who are candor and straightforward about the problems existing in the society. This honesty will improve a positive culture, the effects of which, includes a lucid understanding of the issues that will translate into more clear and effective solutions, which if deployed, will benefit all members of the community.


To sum it up, being honest can improve and enhance both the quality of life in a personal scale and at the same time, provide benefits for the larger social institutions. That's why I believe that we should move toward being more honest in our relationships
it all members of the community.
.

[Saman_R]

Except a few errors, fine as usual
GOOD LUCK

This is the integrated part, tpo 3. I had 5 spelling errors. , I feel like I'm improving.Thanks Saman for commenting on my previous job.


The lecturer provides new evidence that shed more light on the originality of the art piece and even make it very unlikely that the painting is wrongfully attributed to Rembrandt.

The fur of the dress's collar worn by the women. as depicted in the painting, and the contradiction it suggest with the cheap tawdry white cap she is wearing, was actually added later to the painting to possibly increase its extrinsic value, by someone who planned on selling it.

The doubt the reading raises about the inexperience of the painter, because of lack of appropriate analysis of shadow and light, which is far from the level of mastery Rembrandt possesses, is also eliminated, since when we remove the added color, we can clearly see that the subject was wearing a simple white dress, that would reflect the light, thus creating no shadow, as is the case in the painting.


Furthermore, researchers have found out, that the glued wooden frame, which the painting is drawn on, has also been altered by someone else. Most probably the same person who has added the fur to the collar, has also added some extra pieces of woods to the frame to make it look more elegant and luxurious , consequently increasing its value. If we just consider the original frame used at first, this frame not only completely matches the style of frames used in other works of Rembrandt, but it's also made of the material from the same tree, utilized in one of famous paintings of Rembrandt, namely his portrait of himself.

[sir_douglas]

باسلام دوستان من تازه واردم اگر ممکن هست انشای من رو هم یک تصحیحی بفرمایید.
The most important thing in school or any educational institution is to student learn their subjects properly, but what does facilitate learning process and make more efficient? .According to new discovery of psychologist and medical doctors, participating in physical education courses during school time will increase the chance of learning a subject completely. Meanwhile many claim that this enervate students and student will not be able to concentrate in classes because they feel tired but it has been proved that it help the students be relived from all those pressure and stresses. So I do believe when schools are under budgets they should not cut physical education courses because this will help students tremendously.
At first , sports need to be done under stringent supervision of a trainer. Most student probably train on themselves such as running and jogging but they actually are not aware of the effective or proper training procedure, and since if somebody in general do the physical exercises in a wrong way it could damage him/her permanently. Unlike music and art program which can be taught completely at home through the use of internet , physical education are as flexible as music and art in terms of learning and supervision. For example a friend of mine was really in shape but he had never attended to a school gym to train under supervision of somebody and he always used internet as great source of learning, after some years, finally his back bone was damaged tremendously and he needed a surgery for full recovery but after he got better his strength was not like prior and nowadays he can not even perform simple body exercises. So the stringent supervision is required in order to sports help them to stay healthy .
Furthermore, if students pursue their physical education courses more stringent they can have higher chance to get admission in colleges or universities easier. Since many universities especially Ivy League universities offer many scholarships to good sports men and sports women who graduated from college or high school with good record in their prior school sport teams .So not cutting the school physical education program will increase the chance of more students to continue their study to higher level education. In many countries such as such as US, Canada, Iran etc…. students with good record in their school sport team can enter universities with scholarship easily since in some countries again like Iran art and music does not have any kind of scholarship or if there are some sort of scholarship there are not plenty of them not as much as sport scholarship. So physical education courses can improve the chance of those students who take these courses seriously in getting scholarship colleges and universities.
In conclusion, physical education courses can play a major role in the future life of students , since it facilitate the learning process, students have chance to get better scores on their test and help them to attend to better school in future. So physical education courses should not be cut even if school is under budget because of its major contribution to student’s life.
ببخشید نمی دونستم چطور بایستی فایل رو ضمیمه کنم.

[Saman_R]

This is the integrated part, tpo 3. I had 5 spelling errors. , I feel like I'm improving.Thanks Saman for commenting on my previous job.


This is for independent part: Do you think is it more important to seek new friendship or keep old ones?

We as part of human species, are innately interested in social interactions, because it is one of the capabilities that not only distinguishes us from other species, but also has proven to be quite critical for our survival and thriving in this dynamic world. I would argue that, undoubtedly, as is the consensus among prominent psychologists, our friends can have an immense impact on our life, and consequently choosing to make new friendship or to retain the old ones, is of great importance. Personally, I believe that making new friends can prove to be more advantageous for everyone in the long run, and I will give some reasons that better shed light on my argument below.


The psychology research today, is telling us that we tend to mingle with people who are more like us, in terms of attitudes and experiences and socioecomical status, and many of them will later be our friends. These common interests and potentials turn out not to be actually advantageous for one, because they will most probably have access to the same opportunities that we already have , thus providing us with no virgin, new option. So if we retain and stick to our old friendship and do not actively seek new bonds, it's likely that we will never hear about a new job position that is in reach of people who have a very different background compared to us, and as a result, never improve significantly in our career.


Besides that, meeting new people and trying to hang out with them, could possibly push us to be more sociable and outgoing and as a result, improve our interpersonal skills, the eminence of which, is not hidden to no one in this volatile economy that constantly demands the ability to form new connections effectively and rapidly. So an employee who know how to deal with complete strangers in a way that promotes mutual interests, will be of more value to possible employers and will absolutely have more job options offered to him/her.


All in all, I strongly advocate the view that encourages people to form new connections and to find new friends due to the reasons I mentioned above.

Excellent as usual.
Well-organized.
Well-oriented,
Well-expanded and extended
Extremely clear and coherent.
Just a few errors.

GOOD LUCK

[mani_faz]

Thanks Saman for your kind words and your time.

This is for tpo 4. I’m trying to write a new essay everyday so that I can constantly improve. I had 4 spelling errors in each task, which I’ve corrected.

Integrated:

The lecturer provides enough satisfactory arguments that makes the validity of mentioned arguments for endothermity of dinosaurs very unlikely.

First of all, regarding the argument that dinosaurs ought to be endotherms, since some of them lived in Polar Regions, in fact it turns out that at that time, polar regions were not as frigid and icy as they are now, and were actually warmer, warm enough to allow non-endotherm animals to survive. In addition to that, these dinosaurs could hibernate or migrate like many species do, to decrease the adverse effects of coldness.


Besides that, the idea that dinosaurs should be endotherms because their legs are located below their bodies does not sound quite right too, because there are more convincing reasons that explain this anatomical feature, namely that, this status is extremely helpful for mammoth and gigantic animals and can better support the weight of huge animals, as is the case for dinosaurs who definitely took advantage of their huge bodies frequently.

Last but not least, although haversian canals have been found in these creature's bones, another structure called growth rings are also prevalent in their bones, which functions to cease the rapid growth of bones. Thus in essence, one can conclude that, they had subsequent periods of rapid growth (when the weather was warm) and no growth (when the weather was extremely cold), and this pattern perfectly matches the knowledge we already have on reptiles who are not endotherms, and is far from the constant period of growth we observe in all endotherm animals with no exception.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Independent task: In twenty years, there will be fewer cars than there are now.
Currently in many metropolitans all around the world, the number of cars exceeds the population of inhabitants by large, and this has caused some complex issues in urban areas. I personally envision that numerous forces will eventuate in decreased use of personal cars in 20 years from now, and below I point out and express these forces in greater details.

The first and probably the most powerful contributor to less popularity of cars, is the environmental issues created by the unabated use of cars. So just to name a few, excessive use of cars has led to uncontrollable air pollution, sound and noise pollution, and many other ecological plights of that ilk. We are right now clueless about what other measures we can take, to restore our cities to their once clean and balanced environment. So in essence, I believe that the only effective choice we might have to revive our environment is, abandoning this wrong notion, and decrease our dependence and excessive use of cars.


Besides that, the technological advancements made in the recent decades, which are going to continue their exponential growth in coming years, will hopefully convince more people to use public transportation systems, instead of buying and using personal cars. For instance, consider the fact that almost all people in 20 years on, will have access to smart phones equipped with an app that show the movements and the schedule of buses and subway in real time in developing and under developed countries. Such tools evidently encourage more people to choose public transportation because of added efficiency. In addition to that, faster, more convenient trains and buses, with numerous amenities like air conditioner will further encourage them to do so.


Last but not the least, the business model in the future, will be more based on providing online services to customers, like shopping, learning, and entertaining people online, and this will obviate the need for many face to face services that citizen might need to engage in. Consequently, this will make the number of in-city trips to decrease significantly, and as a result, discourage people from buying cars to accommodate their daily needs.

[Al2miN]

Writing 4:
What are some important qualities of a good supervisor (boss)? Use specific details and examples to explain why these qualities are important.

Have a good supervisor at a successful company is an essential need. A boss as a leader at the company has an important role at her/his company, because sometimes, her/his planning and decisions can change company’s situation to bankruptcy or success, and these can be a result of a bad or good planning. This result in that the supervisors at the companies should have many excellent qualities such as: good leader, having knowledge and responsibility.

Good leader is an acceptable idea for everyone, that the boss should has it. There are many advantages in having a good leader as a supervisor at the company that the boss must has those, such as: passed the company at difficult situations, managing his employees to achieve company’s goals successfully. For instance, the supervisor should learn how he/she can lead the company to pass its problems, when she/he face with them, such as: financial problems, facing insolvency, and others dangerous situations which the company has faced with them and should pass them successfully for surviving. In additional, having elite employees is an excellent point for each company. It has some advantages, but its benefits are very more when employees are intelligent managed, and used of their performances for reaching company’s goals by the boss, it needs a person who has a bright mind, and has more capacities to think in an original way and leading.

Another brilliant quality that the supervisor should has, is knowledge. Without having knowledge, it is impossible that the boss can manage and lead the employees. Moreover, as a personally view I believe that somebody who is nominated for managerial position must have more knowledge than another employees who leaded by she/he. Because, the supervisor at the company is a vital post, and many important purposes and planning that are ran must acknowledge by the boss. Furthermore, employees implement somebody’s advices who having more knowledge better than somebody who having less knowledge. It means that the boss with more knowledge has more influences on the company’s worker.

Finally, I think the most important quality for everyone at the company is responsibility. It is an essential need for everyone in her/she live, and more vital for somebody who having the position as a head of the company. Look at the companies as a family member, the boss at the company is look like a father in the family, and consider employees as children in the family, father’s behaviors impact on his children, then imagine a situation which the father don’t have responsibility to do his role as a leader and guide for his family. What will be happen? As a result, his children will be irresponsible, too. He can’t punish his children in the name of irresponsibility. Because he is irresponsible, too. In this view the boss can convey her/his significant feature to the employees. So, when she/he is responsible the employees will be responsible which is fundamental character to achieve prosper.

Long story short, the supervisor’s duties at the company is so significant. She/he can alter company’s condition and solve many difficult problems that the organization face with them, and impact on the other employees. So, she/he must has some substantial qualities and character like good guide and leading company well, having knowledge and responsibility which can transfer from the boss to working and lead the company’s to success.
یکم طولانی شده ولی بعد از چندتا انشایی که دوستان اینجا برام زحمت تصحیحش رو کشیدن و اشکالات رو گفتن میشه گفت این اولین انشا من هست که درش سعی کردم از ساختار پیچیدتر و دلایل منطقی تر بیشتر استفاده کنم که توصیه خود تصحیح کنندهای این سایت بود و منم اجراش کردم. برای همین ممکنه اشکال زیاد داشته باشه. در کل نظرتون درباره کل انشاه چیه. از هر دو عزیزی که زحمت کشیدن و انشاهای من رو تصحیح کردن تشکر ویژه دارم. دستتون درد نکنه.

[Saman_R]

باسلام دوستان من تازه واردم اگر ممکن هست انشای من رو هم یک تصحیحی بفرمایید.
The most important thing in school or any educational institution is to student learn their subjects properly, but what does facilitate learning process and make more efficient? .According to new discovery of psychologist and medical doctors, participating in physical education courses during school time will increase the chance of learning a subject completely. Meanwhile many claim that this enervate students and student will not be able to concentrate in classes because they feel tired but it has been proved that it help the students be relived from all those pressure and stresses. So I do believe when schools are under budgets they should not cut physical education courses because this will help students tremendously.
At first , sports need to be done under stringent supervision of a trainer. Most student probably train on themselves such as running and jogging but they actually are not aware of the effective or proper training procedure, and since if somebody in general do the physical exercises in a wrong way it could damage him/her permanently. Unlike music and art program which can be taught completely at home through the use of internet , physical education are as flexible as music and art in terms of learning and supervision. For example a friend of mine was really in shape but he had never attended to a school gym to train under supervision of somebody and he always used internet as great source of learning, after some years, finally his back bone was damaged tremendously and he needed a surgery for full recovery but after he got better his strength was not like prior and nowadays he can not even perform simple body exercises. So the stringent supervision is required in order to sports help them to stay healthy .
Furthermore, if students pursue their physical education courses more stringent they can have higher chance to get admission in colleges or universities easier. Since many universities especially Ivy League universities offer many scholarships to good sports men and sports women who graduated from college or high school with good record in their prior school sport teams .So not cutting the school physical education program will increase the chance of more students to continue their study to higher level education. In many countries such as such as US, Canada, Iran etc…. students with good record in their school sport team can enter universities with scholarship easily since in some countries again like Iran art and music does not have any kind of scholarship or if there are some sort of scholarship there are not plenty of them not as much as sport scholarship. So physical education courses can improve the chance of those students who take these courses seriously in getting scholarship colleges and universities.
In conclusion, physical education courses can play a major role in the future life of students , since it facilitate the learning process, students have chance to get better scores on their test and help them to attend to better school in future. So physical education courses should not be cut even if school is under budget because of its major contribution to student’s life.
ببخشید نمی دونستم چطور بایستی فایل رو ضمیمه کنم.

Totally, as a beginner, the essay is fascinating. Time management aside, you will be able to write well in the medium-term future.
Also, there are some tips and suggestions that you can find them through pdf attached.
GOOD LUCK

[sir_douglas]

سلام ن دوباره اومدم اگر ممکنه این یکی انشای منو هم یه نگاهی بندازید با تشکر....
Some people believe that U should not pay money to beggar on the street…Do you agree or disagree with statement..?

According to new studies, every 15 minutes, 5 individuals become homeless all over the world. Reasons for such a bleak tragedy are high unemployment rates, stagflation, drug addiction, and etc… and the effect of these reasons on the rate of homelessness differs from one country to another. And since the victims of this tragedy often will be left alone on the streets with no money and hope for future, they become beggar out of paucity and beg for a few bucks on the street in order to be able to buy something to eat. Many people are willing to pay money to the beggars out of sympathy, in contrast some people including me, are not big fans of this philanthropic act for numerous reasons.
From the philanthropic side of view, the money that someone pays to a beggar could be spend in some better ways. This amount of money could be donated to a charity to help people in need , for instance to people if Africa who not only suffer from famine ,they also suffer from numerous fatally diseases such Ebola, Malaria, HIV and etc…. In US by this amount of money a beggar probably would be able to buy something to eat, probably a piece of sandwich but this amount of money could worth much in African countries who are in need. This amount of money in poor countries could immensely help to disinfect so many children from some deadly diseases or probably could help to provide them, with clean water. So it is wisely to donate our money to charity instead of paying beggars because it can vastly contribute to solving major problems in poor countries.
Meanwhile , from the social aspect of view , paying money to beggars is not morally right thing to do. By paying money to them, they will be encouraged to think of beggary as great source to make money with least hardship. So they will not be encouraged to change their current situation for better and they tend to accept the status quo as well condition. So this situation need to be changed for goods of society, because society does not need some people who think about beggary as a great method to make money, in contrary society needs individuals who views making money as hard working and hardship not just simple asking for one. Since this problem need be addressed and to be solved people need to ignore beggars request for money , in order to persuade them implicitly to not accept the current situation and seek for real job.
In conclusion, paying money to beggars is not a philanthropic act as it seems to be, because this amount of money could be well spend in different part of world better or it could help them to become steadfast and change their current situation.And since you can not guess wht does the beggar wants the money for?for buying food or for buying drugs.

[Al2miN]

Writing 4:
What are some important qualities of a good supervisor (boss)? Use specific details and examples to explain why these qualities are important.

Have a good supervisor at a successful company is an essential need. A boss as a leader at the company has an important role at her/his company, because sometimes, her/his planning and decisions can change company’s situation to bankruptcy or success, and these can be a result of a bad or good planning. This result in that the supervisors at the companies should have many excellent qualities such as: good leader, having knowledge and responsibility.

Good leader is an acceptable idea for everyone, ....

Writing 4:
What are some important qualities of a good supervisor (boss)? Use specific details and examples to explain why these qualities are important.

Having a good supervisor at a successful company is an essential need. A boss as a leader at the company has an important role at her/his company, because sometimes, her/his planning and decisions can change company’s situation to bankruptcy or success, and these can be a result of a bad or good planning. This result in that the supervisors at the companies should have many excellent qualities such as: good leader, having knowledge and responsibility.

Good leader is an acceptable view for everyone, that the boss must has it. There are many advantages in having a good leader as a supervisor at the company that the boss must has those, such as: passed the company in a difficult situations, managing her/his employees to achieve company’s goals successfully. For instance, the supervisor must know how he/she can lead the company to pass its problems, when she/he face with them, like financial problems, facing insolvency, and others dangerous situations which the company has faced with them and should pass them successfully for surviving. In additional, having elite employees is an excellent point for each company. It has some advantages, but its benefits are very more when employees are managed purposefully, and used of their performances for reaching company’s goals by the boss, it needs a person who has a bright mind, and has more capacities to think in an original way and leading.

Another brilliant quality that the supervisor must has, is knowledge. Without having knowledge, it is impossible that the boss can manage and lead the employees. Moreover, as a personally view I believe that somebody who is nominated for managerial position must have more knowledge than another employees who leaded by she/he. Because, the supervisor's position at the company is vital, and many important purposes and planning that are ran must acknowledge by the boss. Furthermore, employees implement somebody’s advices who having more knowledge better than somebody who having less knowledge. It means that the boss with more knowledge has more influences on the company’s worker.

Finally, I think the most curcial quality for everyone at the company is responsibility. It is an essential need for everyone in her/she live, and more vital for somebody who having the position as a head of the company. Look at the companies as a family member, the boss at the company is look like a father in the family, and consider employees as children in the family, it is logical that father’s behaviors impact on his children. So, imagine a situation which on the father don’t have responsibility to do his role as a leader and guide for his family. What will be happen? As a result, his children will be irresponsible, too. He can’t punish his children in the name of irresponsibility. Because he is irresponsible, too. In this view the boss can convey her/his significant feature to the employees. So, when she/he is responsible the employees will be responsible which is fundamental character to achieve prosper.

Long story short, the supervisor’s duties at the company is so significant. She/he can alter company’s condition and solve many difficult problems that the organization face with them, and impact on the other employees. So, she/he must has some substantial qualities and character like good guide and leading company well, having knowledge and responsibility which can transfer from the boss to working and lead the company’s to success.
یکبار مرور کردم متن رو و یکیری تصحیحات رو که فکر کردم باید جمله رو بهتر کنه اعمال کردم که بولد شده تو این قسمت. تا جایی که در توانم هست سعی میکنم درست کنم انشا رو ولی مطمئنا کمک شما خیلی بهتر هست ممنون میشم بیشتر راهنمییم کنید. سپاس