نمونه های writing کاربران و بررسی آنها

[minoosaba]

سلام.

تا اونجایی که میدونستم اشکالات رو نوشتم براتون. در رابطه با نمره متاسفانه اطلاعی ندارم.

موفق باشید.

[mehran4iut]

سلام.
تی*پی*او شماره 23- تسک 2
Agree or disagree
In today's world, it is more important to work quickly and risk making mistakes than to work slowly and make sure that everything is correct.In today's world, it is more important to work quickly and risk making mistakes than to work slowly and make sure that everything is correct.
ممنون میشم نظراتتون رو بگید
البته تا جایی که خودم تونستم اصلاحش کردم و با قرمز مشخص کرده ام. یه سری متن هم اضافه کردم و یکم طولانی شد.
بازم ممنون

[minoosaba]

سلام.
تی*پی*او شماره 23- تسک 2
Agree or disagree
In today's world, it is more important to work quickly and risk making mistakes than to work slowly and make sure that everything is correct.In today's world, it is more important to work quickly and risk making mistakes than to work slowly and make sure that everything is correct.
ممنون میشم نظراتتون رو بگید
البته تا جایی که خودم تونستم اصلاحش کردم و با قرمز مشخص کرده ام. یه سری متن هم اضافه کردم و یکم طولانی شد.
بازم ممنون

درود.

موفق باشید.

[minoosaba]

Writing 1:
When you attend a university, would you prefer to live on campus or off campus? Use reasons and examples to support your answer.


For a student it is possible to live on campus or off campus. I believe that it is better to live on campus than off campus. I feel it is the best choice for me for two main reasons. First, living on campus provides more opportunities to interact with other students. Second, that’s costs are lower than to live off campus. For these reasons, I feel that living on campus is better for me.

To begin with, living on campus provides more opportunities to interact with other students. When I living on campus, I see my classmates more. If I have a problem or question about my courses I can see my classmates and they can help me to learn my courses. Interact with other students provides more opportunities to talk about study or courses. So, I can learn more. Moreover, I have more chances to make friends. For example, when I was student I had a few friends, after a semester I made more friends. I saw more students when I was living on campus. I interacted with my classmates more and made more friends.

Secondly, living on campus costs are low. As a student it is important for me to save my money. Many students can’t work, they don’t have time for working because they must studying. Furthermore, if I don’t have a financial problem I may study better. For instance, when I was student, I saw some students that they had to work and study. Their living costs were high and they had to work a lot. As a result, they didn’t have sufficient time for studying. They got bad grade in their exams.

To sun it up, I feel that living on campus is a very good choice for me. This is because living on campus provides more opportunities to interact with others, and that’s costs are low. I think there really is no better choice that I have as a student.

سلام این اولین رایتینگ من هست . برای شروع چطوره؟ ممنون میشم مسکلاتم رو بگید. با 4 ماه وقت میشه این رایتینگ رو در سطح 24 تافل رسوند؟ ممنونم

درود.

مطالبی رو در فایل پیوست براتون نوشتم.

موفق باشید.

[minoosaba]

سلام دوستان
نمرهی رایتینگ امتحان من 22 شد int:fair ind:good
میخوام یه ماه دیگه بازم امتحان بدم, نمونه ی اخرین رایتینگ int رو میفرستم لطفا نظرتون رو نسبت بهش بدین و ایا به نظر شما template خوبی داره؟ و چطور میتونم ارتقاش بدم؟

In this set of materials, the reading passage revolves around several explanations about Chevalier's memoir inaccuracy; on the other hand, the professor is at loggerheads with the author over the explanations. She rules out all the aforementioned explanations and states that the memoir is accurate and it is a reliable historical record.

First, the professor claims that the Chevalier was not poor and he did spend a lot of money on parties and gambling. Chevalier's wealth was mostly properties that he had to sell them when he needed money so it would take few days to sell those properties and because of that he borrowed money from Swiss merchants. This directly refutes the reading passage, which states that since he borrowed money from wealthy people, his claims about his wealth is false.

Second, the professor states that according to Chevalier claims that every night after his meeting with Voltaire, Chevalier noted their conversations and when the chevalier was writing his memoir, he referred to those notes. Again, this contradicts the reading passage, which states that it is true that Chevalier and Voltaire had met but since chevalier wrote the memoir years after meetings but he would have forgotten their conversations.

Finally, there are a lot of people in that prison who had more powerful friends than chevalier so why they did not escape from the jail; also according to Venetian governmental documents, the very night that the chevalier escaped, the ceiling of the prison had to be repaired and this is the evidence of chevalier escape. However, the author claims that the jailors were bribed by Chevalier's connected politician friends.

سلام.

فایل رو براتون ضمیمه کردم. امیدوارم موثر واقع بشه.

موفق باشید.

[Al2miN]

Minooosaba عزیز خیلی ممنون بابت وقتی که گذاشتی. من رایتینگ های دیگه خودم رو هم قرار میدم. هر کدوم رو وقت داشتی تصحیح کنی ممنونت میشم. سپاس فراوان.
Example 2:
Some people prefer to travel alone. Others like to travel in groups. Which do you think is the best way to travel? Use specific reasons and examples to explain your choice.


Travel is a way for relaxing and learn about new places. People can travel alone or in groups. I prefer to travel in groups. I feel this way is the best choice for me for two main reasons. First, its costs are lower than traveling alone. Second, travel in a group provides more opportunities to makes friends and give information. For these reasons I believe that traveling in groups is the best choice for me.

To begin with, traveling in groups is more economical. When people travel in groups their costs are divided between group’s members. For example, I traveled with my friends by my personal car last year. I must spent a lot of money for my car’s gasoline, but my friends shared their money with me and helped me for pay some costs. Also, hotel’s prices are low for groups. I remember that a room for rent was 20$ for a person at each night, but its rental price for two person was 30$. Moreover, agency provides some tour, sometimes they have some off in their travel. Hotels have offer for tour agency and they provides some services at low cast for their travelers.

Secondly, travel in groups provides more chances for makes friends and give information. Communicating in groups during the travel is more. We share our idea and discussing about many subjects which faced on travel and give some information of each other. For instance, I remember that in a travel I had some questions about the history of an ancient city. A person who is in group had historic knowledge about the city and give me more information and answer to my questions. Furthermore, I have had a lot of friends of my travels in groups. For illustrate, last year, in a travel we had an accident. We helped each other and after that many of us make friends with each other.

To sum it up, I feel to travel in groups is very good and logical choice for me. This is because in groups, I can interact with other people more, and costs are low. I think there really is no better choice than traveling with other people for me.

[minoosaba]

Minooosaba عزیز خیلی ممنون بابت وقتی که گذاشتی. من رایتینگ های دیگه خودم رو هم قرار میدم. هر کدوم رو وقت داشتی تصحیح کنی ممنونت میشم. سپاس فراوان.
Example 2:
Some people prefer to travel alone. Others like to travel in groups. Which do you think is the best way to travel? Use specific reasons and examples to explain your choice.


Travel is a way for relaxing and learn about new places. People can travel alone or in groups. I prefer to travel in groups. I feel this way is the best choice for me for two main reasons. First, its costs are lower than traveling alone. Second, travel in a group provides more opportunities to makes friends and give information. For these reasons I believe that traveling in groups is the best choice for me.

To begin with, traveling in groups is more economical. When people travel in groups their costs are divided between group’s members. For example, I traveled with my friends by my personal car last year. I must spent a lot of money for my car’s gasoline, but my friends shared their money with me and helped me for pay some costs. Also, hotel’s prices are low for groups. I remember that a room for rent was 20$ for a person at each night, but its rental price for two person was 30$. Moreover, agency provides some tour, sometimes they have some off in their travel. Hotels have offer for tour agency and they provides some services at low cast for their travelers.

Secondly, travel in groups provides more chances for makes friends and give information. Communicating in groups during the travel is more. We share our idea and discussing about many subjects which faced on travel and give some information of each other. For instance, I remember that in a travel I had some questions about the history of an ancient city. A person who is in group had historic knowledge about the city and give me more information and answer to my questions. Furthermore, I have had a lot of friends of my travels in groups. For illustrate, last year, in a travel we had an accident. We helped each other and after that many of us make friends with each other.

To sum it up, I feel to travel in groups is very good and logical choice for me. This is because in groups, I can interact with other people more, and costs are low. I think there really is no better choice than traveling with other people for me.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Good luck

[mehran4iut]

سلام. وقت بخیر
من چندین بار انشا تسک اول رو اینجا گذاشته ام که یه نظری از دوستان بگیرم، ولی فکر کنم کسی علاقه ای به تصحیح این نوع نداره!
می دونم خیلی وابسته است که چقدر از لکچر رو منعکس کرده باشم، ولی نمیشه یک نفر یه نمونه صحیح کنه تا درباره روند و قالب اون مطمئن بشم؟
تی*پی*او 25. تسک اول
ممنون

[Babaii]

سلام. وقت بخیر
من چندین بار انشا تسک اول رو اینجا گذاشته ام که یه نظری از دوستان بگیرم، ولی فکر کنم کسی علاقه ای به تصحیح این نوع نداره!
می دونم خیلی وابسته است که چقدر از لکچر رو منعکس کرده باشم، ولی نمیشه یک نفر یه نمونه صحیح کنه تا درباره روند و قالب اون مطمئن بشم؟
تی*پی*او 25. تسک اول
ممنون

انشا ایتگریتد سرراسته از لحاظ قالب. در 95 درصد موارد متن و استادی که راجع به متن حرف میزنه در مقابل هم قرار میگیرند. بنابراین نوع transitionها و ساختار کلی به صورت زیر خواهد بود. در ضمن 95 درصد انشا این تسکتون رو اختصا بدین به اونچه توی لکچر گفته شده. چون متن همواره در دیدتون هست، مصحح زیاد اهمیت نمیده شما چقدر از متن رو آوردین توی انشاتون. درضمن، تا جایی که میتونید کلمات و چملات لکچر و یا متن رو که در انشاتون میارین، با یه معادلش تعویض کنین. این برای گرفتن نمره هر چه عالیتر به شدت موثر هست.

مثلا متن ادعایی میکنه و سه دلیل برای پشتیبانی از ادعاش میگه. استاد مو به مو روی هر یک از اینها نظر میده و با evidence اونها رو ریجکت میکنه. حالا پاراگراف اول اینطور آغاز کنین که؛
the author claims/states/... that ... Contrary to this, the professor reasons/states/.. that
transition های دیگه هم هست:
on the contrary
opposite to this
contrarily
But

بجای فعل state هم میتونین اینا رو بکار ببرین:
point out
remark
add
express

همین ساختار رو برای بقیه پاراگراف ها و بدور از تکرار، پیاده کنین. اگه استاد بیش از یک دلیل برای رد کردن یه ادعای مشخص نویسنده بکار برد، برای transition ی که بخواد این دلیل روی استفاده کنه هم که میتونین اینا رو استفاده کنین:
additionally
in addition
moreover و ...

برای مقدمه هم شاید بعدا حوصله کردم و گفتم و البته نکات ریز دیگه. این تمام ساختاریه که لازمه انشاتون رعایت کنه( برای حالت غالبی که استاد و متن با هم دعوا دارن)

[information2]

با سلام
این اولین متنیه که نوشتم . ممنون میشم تصحیح کنید
The best way to travel is in a group led by a tour gide.

Do you think that the individual traveling is boring? Some people prefer spending their time with him/herself, but in my view, trip with the group led by a tour leader is more fun and enjoyable. Although, the visiting nature and environment places, maybe more interesting in person, however, I prefer to visit new interesting places with the group guided by a tour leader, because it has more positive side than the individual trip.

The most positive feature of a tour leader is, having many major information about the places that you will have visited. In this way, you can get more knowledge about the new area easily and instantly. Moreover, it makes your visit more enjoyable too. For example, two years ago, when I was a university student, I have gone to Isfahan with my classmates and we had a tour leader. Even though, I had a trip before that to Isfahan, but the tour guide made me a difference and interest perspective. I couldn't believe, because I thought it was a first time that I have visited this ancient and fascinate place.

Another criteria reason is, saving to you more time and money. When you know where place are more significant to visit? Or when time of day is better to visit some places like museum or monument? It certainly leads saving your time and money. As I recall, five years ago, me and my little brother went to the Hamadan city for the first time and we hadn't any experience and information about this city, we found that we didn't visited some major and significant monument after we came back from Hamadan and the hotel that we have settled was very expensive too. Our hotel was very far from the center of the city that it leads to spending more time with transportation.

In conclusion, having a person who guide you lead to having more data and information about everywhere you visited and saving your time and money during the travel.